and may the odds be ever in your favor
by turtleducklings
Summary: He's loved her since day one, and he'll love her until he dies. -— Peeta/Katniss. A series of chronological vignettes, following Peeta from pre-Hunger Games to post-Mockingjay.
1. melody

and may the odds be ever in your favor.

**peeta**

( _dandelion blaze_ )

disclaimer: not mine.

* * *

_melody  
..._

It's the first day of school, and you're terribly excited. Your father walks you to the school house. You're bouncing up and down, unable to contain your joy.

Dad stands with you as you wait outside to line up. Your older brothers run off to meet with their friends. You don't have any friends yet, so you just stand with Dad.

He taps you on the shoulder suddenly. "See that little girl?" he asks. You look where he's pointing. There's a girl, your age, standing there. She's wearing a red plaid dress, and her hair is in two braids, one on either side of her head, framing her face.

You nod. He continues, "I wanted to marry her mother, but she ran off with a coal miner."

"A coal miner?" you ask incredulously. "Why did she want a coal miner when she could have had you?"

He keeps his eyes on the girl as he says, "Because when he sings... even the birds stop to listen."

You look at the girl again as the teachers come out, saying that it's time to line up and go inside. You bid your father goodbye and follow the rest of your class indoors.

Later that day, in music assembly, the teacher asks if anyone knows the valley song.

The little girl from before, the one whose mother married a coal miner instead of your dad, shoots her hand into the air.

"Okay, Katniss," the teacher says. That must be the little girl's name. "Let's hear it."

Katniss stands up on her wooden stool. She clears her throat and begins to sing.

As soon as the first note rings out, clear and sweet, every bird outside falls silent.

As she's singing, you see nothing but her, hear nothing but her. She is the only thought in your mind.

When she's finished, she sits back down. The whole class applauds. You clap the loudest, but you doubt she notices.

And even though you're only five and shouldn't know what love is or what love means, you do.

Because you now are head over heels in love with Katniss Everdeen.

And that afternoon, you vow that one day, you'll get her to fall in love with you, too.


	2. coward

and may the odds be ever in your favor.

**peeta**

( _dandelion blaze_ )

disclaimer: not mine.

* * *

_coward  
..._

You're starting your sixth year of formal education now, and you laugh at the fact that you used to get excited for school. Now all you feel towards the subject is pure dread.

Your least favorite class is ironically also your favorite. _History_. Every lesson is always the same; it's been like that for nearly forever. They talk about pre-Panem, the Dark Days, the destruction of District 13, and then you have to write an essay on how society is so much better now than it was before. _Ugh_.

The only upside to this class is that you share it with Katniss. You often spend History period thinking about her, how _she's right behind you_. She even hands her papers forward to _you_ at the end of tests!

You think that someday, possibly, you'll get a life. Maybe.

But for now, you're going to spend your days thinking of conversation starters that you can use on her. Yes, you still haven't worked up the nerve to actually _talk_ to her. You rack your memory and can't seem to remember a time when you even actually made eye contact.

_Coward_, you berate yourself.

You're not too worried though. You know there's plenty of school year left. And you're determined that by the end of your fifth grade year, you'll have had _some_ sort of interaction with Katniss Everdeen.


	3. dreaming, pt one

and may the odds be ever in your favor.

**peeta**

( _dandelion blaze_ )

disclaimer: not mine.

* * *

_dreaming, pt. one_  
_..._

You, of course, notice the change right away. Katniss has always been closed off, but now... now she is even more so than before. She keeps her eyes on the ground as she walks, doesn't acknowledge anyone's presence, and answers the teacher's questions in an annoyed and angry voice, as though she can't understand why in the world they would bother her while she's just sitting in her desk, minding her own business.

You're considering approaching her about it, asking what's wrong, when you hear the news. You didn't dare ask anyone about it, that would tip people off that you're interested in her. No, you hear about it through the school gossip.

Some silly girl who undoubtedly fancies you is sitting with you at lunchtime, telling you about something or other, and you're just tuning her out, as you usually do with all of the other girls. You're staring at Katniss, who's eating lunch alone, shoulders hunched forward, as though she's trying to make herself as small as possible.

"... so, that's all I told him, and that was the end of that. Anyway, did you hear about that Katniss girl?"

You're paying attention now. You snap up and turn toward the girl, Kyra. "What about Katniss?"

Kyra leans forward and starts to whisper, "Her father died in that mine accident yesterday. People are saying that she's done for now. She and her sister'll be in the community home by the end of the month."

"What? Well, what about her mom, what is she doing about it?"

"People are saying that her mom checked out. She's in shock." You wonder where exactly Kyra got this information, but you don't question it. You're too busy thinking. "Anyway," Kyra continues, "They're holding a ceremony this afternoon, after school. I think Katniss gets a medal, because she's the oldest in her family."

Then Kyra gets up and bids you goodbye, but you stay seated, unable to take your eyes off of Katniss.

Poor Katniss. This can't be happening to her. How can it be happening to her? Can't you help her?

You wish with all of your heart that you could fix it. You'd do anything to make her happy again.


	4. dreaming, pt two

and may the odds be ever in your favor.

**peeta**

( _dandelion blaze_ )

disclaimer: not mine.

* * *

_dreaming, pt. two  
..._

It's raining. Again. You look out the window as you slide another batch of bread into the oven.

Your mother's head shoots up suddenly. There's a faint clanging noise coming from outside. "Seam brats are pawing through our trash again..." she grumbles as she walks to the door and throws it open. All you can hear is your mother yelling and then a clattering of the trash bin lid. You creep up behind your mother and look out to find... you try to refrain from gasping with horror.

_Katniss_.

You watch as she backs away slowly. It's then that you realize how horribly skinny she looks. The rain is causing her clothes to stick to her body. Her hair hangs in her face in dripping, stringy strands, and her lips are an icy blue. She looks scared.

Your mother goes back inside, leaving you to stand in the doorway alone. You watch as Katniss goes to the back of your yard. She leans against your old apple tree before her knees buckle and she falls to the ground.

You hope that you're dreaming. You can't believe this is happening. Your fists clench and you know what you need to do.

You go back inside and get the wooden bread paddle out, sticking it into the oven. You pretend to be taking out the bread. As you slide the paddle under the warm loaves, you tip the end ever so slightly. Both of the loaves fall into the fire with a _crunch_.

Your mother spins around and gasps. She runs over and whisks the bread out if the fire. She grabs the spatula sitting on the counter and smacks you with it. She yells, using the ugliest of ugly words, but you don't let it get to you. She drops the loaves in your arms, shoves you out the door and screams, "_Feed it to the pig, you stupid creature! Why not? No one decent will buy burned bread!_"

You begin to tear off burned chunks and throw them into the trough. The bell rings and your mother runs back inside. You take one look over your shoulder to make sure she's really gone, then you toss the loaves over in Katniss' direction and run back inside without a second glance.

You've accomplished your mission.


	5. luck

and may the odds be ever in your favor.

**peeta**

( _dandelion blaze_ )

disclaimer: not mine.

* * *

_luck  
..._

Fast forward a few years. You still haven't talked to Katniss. But you figure that giving her that bread maybe makes up for it. She at least knows you exist, now.

You face your first, second, third, fourth reapings. Every time you're more scared for Katniss than you are for yourself. You aren't sure why, though. She doesn't love you the way you love her, and sometimes you're not even sure that what you feel for her is actually love.

You eventually say yes to some of the girls and start dating. But none of them make an impression on you as Katniss has. Maybe you are actually in love with her.

Your fifth reaping comes around, and you're just as nervous as you've been in past years. You stand there, trying not to look too anxious, as Effie Trinket opens the slip of paper with the girl's name agonizingly slowly. "Primrose Everdeen!"

You let out a sigh of relief, which quickly turns into a horrified gasp as you register the last name. Everdeen. Then that means...

Sure enough, you hear Katniss yelling, "Prim!" The little twelve-year-old girl who was walking bravely towards the stage turns around. And with just one sentence, your worst fears are confirmed. "I volunteer as tribute!" Katniss shouts.

It seems so surreal. You watch as Katniss makes her way up to the stage, pushing through people, ignoring Primrose's protests. Then she's standing on the stage, next to Effie Trinket.

You don't listen to what happens after that. At least, until, Effie calls out the boy's name. "Peeta Mellark!"

You decide right then that you're not quite sure if it was good luck or bad that led you to be standing next to the girl you've been in love with most of your life, shaking her hand, essentially agreeing that you're going to try your hardest to kill each other in a few weeks.


	6. breathtaking

and may the odds be ever in your favor.

**peeta**

( _dandelion blaze_ )

disclaimer: not mine.

* * *

_breathtaking  
..._

You think that Portia may be the most insane person you've ever met. You mean, that's the only explanation. Anyone who comes up to you and says, "Hi, nice to meet you, I'm Portia, oh, and by the way, just a heads up, _I'm going to light you on fire for the opening ceremony_" is obviously off their rocker. But what other choice do you have than to obey? You have to listen to what Haymitch told you.

After Portia tells you that you and Katniss are going to be matching, you can't help but laugh a little. You imagine stony, closed-off Katniss being delivered the news that she's going to be on fire in front of all of Panem. That thought alone helps you get through the remaining terrifying hours of prep and costume-donning.

Sometime later, Portia whisks you off to the bottom level of the Remake Center. There are horses and chariots for each pair of tributes. You and Katniss will be going last, as you're from Disctrict 12. Portia and Katniss' stylist, Cinna, direct you and Katniss to the chariot and help you up before arranging your body positions and costumes. Then they go off to consult with each other.

Katniss leans over and whispers, "What do you think?"

You're terrified, in truth. But, well, that's embarrassing to admit. So you just vaguely say through gritted teeth, "I'll rip off your cape if you'll rip off mine."

"Deal," she says. She continues, "I know we promised Haymitch we'd do exactly what they said, but I don't think he considered this angle."

She has a good point. "Where is Haymitch, anyway?" You ask. "Isn't he supposed to protect us from this sort of thing?"

Katniss is silent for a moment before replying solemnly, "With all that alcohol in him, it's probably not advisable to have him around an open flame."

You're both quiet for a moment before bursting forth in laughter. You're not too sure why you're laughing, but you don't mind, because just hearing that bell of a laugh and seeing that breathtaking smile on her face is the most amazing thing you've ever heard and seen.

You're interrupted by the opening music. The doors open and the chariots start riding into the City Circle. Cinna appears with a lighted torch. "Here we go then," he says merrily, and before you can say or do anything you're on fire. You scrunch your eyes shut, waiting for the burns, but to your surprise and great relief, they don't come. Cinna climbs up and lights your headdresses on fire as well. He sighs, "It works." He pauses and says, "Remember, heads high. Smiles. They're going to love you!"

Cinna jumps down, seems to have one last idea and turns around. He shouts something at you. "What's he saying?" Katniss asks.

"I think he said for us to hold hands," you inform her. You reach for her hand and look to Cinna. He nods and gives you a thumbs-up before he's swallowed up by the Remake Center and all you can see are flashing lights and crowds of brightly colored people.

All you're aware of is the cheers of the crowd and Katniss' hand gripping yours tightly. Because of this, you can't help but smile. And for the first time, you get a glimpse of yourself on one of the large monitors surrounding the City Circle. But your eyes aren't drawn to just yourself... all you can see is Katniss. Smiling, laughing, blowing kisses to the crowd with her free hand.

And even though you're on your way to death, you can't help but be happy. Because the girl you've been in love with for as long as you can remember, that independent, unapproachable girl, is now gripping your hand and eating up the crowd's praise.

You just can't help it. You smile too. Smile at the girl who has pulled your heart even further away from yourself. It's hers fully. And even though you know that you're going to die in a week or so, you know without a doubt that your heart will always be hers. _Always_.


	7. plans

and may the odds be ever in your favor.

**peeta**

( _dandelion blaze_ )

disclaimer: not mine.

* * *

_plans  
..._

You are going to _kill_ Haymitch.

No, really.

You're actually considering taking that steak knife on the table and plunging it into his chest.

There is _no_ way you can go through with this. It's crazy. You mean, has he even _seen _Katniss? If you state in front of the entire country that you're in love with her, that there are _several boys_ in love with her, she'll do worse than kill you. She'll give you a painful death and then make sure you suffer in the afterlife too.

When you first told him that you kind of (completely) like (love) Katniss back on the train, you had no idea that he was going to bring it up again and use it during interview strategy. No idea.

If you had, you wouldn't have told him.

"She's going to kill me."

"Eh, one less competitor."

You really, _really_ wish that he was not drunk for this. Or, maybe he isn't drunk. Maybe he's just _crazy._

Which at this point, is a very big possibility.

"Are you serious right now?"

He shrugs. "Katniss is the least of our worries. Trust me, the Capitol people will eat this up. Everybody will be scrambling to sponsor you, to try to save the 'star-crossed lovers'."

You throw your hands up. "Oh, perfect. Except we're not exactly 'star-crossed lovers'."

"Yeah, but the Capitol people don't know that."

There are so many ways that this plan could backfire. But if you said that you weren't willing to try it, you'd be lying.

You sigh. "Fine. I'll do it."

He smiles. "Great. Now our only problem is Katniss."

"What? I thought you said she was the least of our worries!"

"She is. But she's also our _only_ worry."

Again. So. Many. Ways.


End file.
